ExChristian.Net -- encouraging ex-Christians - Latest Comments in Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Joshua Putnam — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 01:54:43 -0000

well as you can read for you self the lord in the past has used children to speak his word. There is nothing wrong with them preaching look at Naaman the syrian he was sent to Elisha the prophet by a young hebrew maiden. Matthew 12:27 And if I by Beelzebub cast out devils, by whom do your children cast them out? therefore they shall be your judges. the whole matter is can you believe that God can or will you not believe even though one rose from the dead. well all men have not faith but lean unto their own understanding

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Lee — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 16:19:36 -0000

Why is this such a bad thing? Kids at very young ages are playing sports, practicing and performing on the piano or violin, doing many other things that may lead to their lifelong calling or career. Why not go pick on some of these young kids who are into activities like drugs, vandalism and violence or who sit around wasting their time doing a bunch of nothing and disrespecting others? Applaud these kids for having a meaningful purpose that might lead to a fulfilling life vocation or calling as adults. They aren't hurting you and they are helping and being helped by those who support and care for them.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

daytripper1964 — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 10:04:06 -0000

"brain malfunction"
that is the best description of faith I've heard in a long time!

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

cipher — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 08:33:24 -0000

Oh! Never mind!

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

glebealyth — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 08:14:25 -0000

Cipher,

Are you sure the last two words were necessary?

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

cipher — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 08:14:23 -0000

You've lost me.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

glebealyth — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 08:12:56 -0000

Astreja,

I have seen, on Skegness beach, the second coming of a donkey. Whilst a little embarrassing, it was certainly spectacular.

Kevin only qualifies for the first adjective so fails to make the grade, I'm afraid.

David

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

cipher — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 08:08:13 -0000

Kevin: "God used a donkey once to send his word."

Then you must be the Second Coming of that donkey, Kevin.

It's been said many times, but it bears repeating - fundies have absolutely no sense of irony.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Astreja — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 02:45:17 -0000

Kevin: "God used a donkey once to send his word."

Then you must be the Second Coming of that donkey, Kevin.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

sconnor — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 01:44:41 -0000

kevin Delusional,

The fact of the matter is that if God chooses a rock to preach no matter how much we object to it, the rock is going to preach.

The fact of thee matter is: Who are we to judge what or who God uses, The BIBLE says that in the last days will he pour out his spirit upon ALL Flesh. Think about that.

The fact of the matter
The fact of the matter
The fact of the matter

The fact of the matter? Are you F-ing kidding me?

The fact of the matter is you don't have any facts you benighted assh*le.

How, the hell, do you know if god chooses preachers?

Facts? You don't have any FACTS.

You're, simply, pulling this sh*t out of your a$$, without any facts to substantiate your claims.

Furthermore, the bible is just a collection of Jewish fairy tales and superstitious mumbo-jumbo, that was written by men, who used the, supposed, voice of god, to lend it credibility, where there is none.

You're the one who is the gullible sod, who believes it is the word of god, solely on, the brain malfunction, you call faith -- you have NO objective evidence (NO FACTS) to prove it otherwise. Comprende?

All your assertions are nothing but the ravings of a lunatic; a delusional christian zealot, who most, assuredly has NO facts to substantiate his extraordinary claims.

We only deal in objective evidence here. Got any for the existence of your god or for anything you've spewed out your pie-hole?

Thought not; be on your way, cuckoo.

--S.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 01:38:35 -0000

Kevin D: Jesus began preaching when he was twelve years old

Yes, your storybook does seem to tell us this, but answer me this then....

What did jesus do at ages 13, 14, 15, 16, and 17?

Maybe those he pissed-off at age 12, had him locked-away during his (unreported) teen-rebellious years?

ATF (Who is surprised that no one has written a book called; The Secret Teen Years of Jesus)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 00:56:23 -0000

Philip,

RE: that in the last days will he pour out his spirit upon ALL Flesh

It means that in the last days, god is finally giving up his bad alcohol addiction and pouring out all his heavenly bottles of 'spirits' upon the earth, and hence, upon all flesh.
I heard god is a "mean drunk" to.

ATF (Who now understands what has caused god's occasional unfounded anger, especially in the OT days)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Philip — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 17:02:17 -0000

The BIBLE says that in the last days will he pour out his spirit upon ALL Flesh. Think about that.

What the hell is this supposed to mean?

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Thackerie — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 13:56:26 -0000

"God used a donkey once to send his word."

We can be sure that someone was speaking out of his ass, but there's no evidence it was a god.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 13:30:24 -0000

Kevin D,
I'm sure you're right about 12 year old children preachers being sent by god.
Heck, I've got one living down the block from me and he is no doubt a direct messenger from god.

So far, I've witnessed him use the holy power of jesus to 'heal the undead', 'raise the sick', 'put demons in a cast', un-drown vile pigs, dilute wine into water, and walk on frozen water.

ATF (Who thinks god made a donkey talk, because god is a jack-ASS himself)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

ryan — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 12:39:44 -0000

Are you suggesting that any time we see somebody preaching the bible, that person has been "called" by god? That is the siliest thing I have ever heard. I have been around to more churches than I care to admit, and time after time, sunday after sunday, I would listen to these bible-school graduates who didn't have the sense to wipe their asses; who had no more brains than the children in this post. No, I take that back; they had less. It seems to me that your god picks out simple-minded shitkickers to do his bidding--such people haven't the brains to resist, or to question in the first place. Now what does that tell us about your religion?

If what I have seen of pastors and evangelists, of whatever age, is an indication of who your god wants as his spokesmen, then leave me out of it.

And about your jesus: many of us believe he never existed, and if he did, we do not know what he preached. Again, the shit that your "spokesmen" claim to be the words of jesus can go down the nearest sewer. I would not listen to jesus any more than I would listen to a talking donkey. But then I repeat myself.

I came on this post by accident. I have no intention or desire to return to it. I need to return to newer posts. If you care to discuss this--it should be amusing--you can email me rpa1543@saintjoe.edu. I do not expect to hear "shutup" again. Tell me to shutup to my face and you'll be shitting your teeth.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

glebealyth — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 12:32:42 -0000

Jesus began preaching at 12, in a culture where the average lifespan was under 40. In other words, he was approximately 30% of the way through his life when he began this career.
Now that we live in a culture where the average lifespan is closer to 80, it would be polite to begin a preaching career at around 25, which would ba about pro rata.
This 30% gives the "preacher" time to reach a level in society at which his public endeavours can be met with respect by the listeners. Until then, these poor little children are the, predominantly, male equivalents of the little beauty queens that have their lives ruined by their inadequate parents.

To allow or, I suspect, encourage these ignorant, unprepared children to assume adult roles approaches the obscene.

As for God not asking "our permission went he sent Jesus down here". That really gives his mother Mary a real sort of "Free Will", does it not? If permission (consent) was not asked (obtained) then your leader is the result of a rape.

About par for the course, Kevin, given the evidence of your god's character in your buybull.

Peace,

David

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Kevin D — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 11:24:07 -0000

Jesus began preaching when he was twelve years old, does that offend some of you too? The fact of the matter is that if God chooses a rock to preach no matter how much we object to it, the rock is going to preach. God didn't ask our permission when he sent Jesus down here did he? Now I don't know wheather a lot of the things this little boy says is because of his father or not, or iuf he understands it fully or not, but if he is preaching God's word SHUTUP! God used a donkey once to send his word. He uses what and who he wants. Many of us older people, God has called into the ministry (not neccessarily behind the pulpit) but we don't answer the call, so God found someone who will answer the call. The fact of thee matter is: Who are we to judge what or who God uses, The BIBLE says that in the last days will he pour out his spirit upon ALL Flesh. Think about that.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Astreja — Mon, 26 May 2008 00:58:00 -0000

(goes over to the cabinet in Her dining room and takes long, hard look at a now half-empty bottle of Scotch) Nope, no genies here, ATF. Must've gotten out when I cracked the seal on the bottle.

But I foresee a bottle of Green Chartreuse in the not-too-distant future, and shall check for genies there, too.

In the meantime, we do seem to have confirmed the existence of drinkable spirits. And self-fulfilling prophesies by Those who like to consume them.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Sun, 25 May 2008 14:26:00 -0000

Astreja wrote:
Great idea, ATF! (wanders downstairs and pours Herself two fingers of Glenfiddich
---
Astreja,

After you drank the two fingers of Glenfiddich, did you happen to notice any genie's around?
These bottle genie's seem to be just as illusive as the xtian god.

ATF (Who thinks one can get their genie wishes granted, far more often than god prayers)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Astreja — Sun, 25 May 2008 00:42:00 -0000

Pouring out spirit? Great idea, ATF!

(wanders downstairs and pours Herself two fingers of Glenfiddich)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Sat, 24 May 2008 02:11:00 -0000

Astreja wrote to redeemed99:
Uh, wrong website
---
Astreja,

I doubt the redeemer will ever come back to trade in their 99 god delusion stamps for a book of reality?
I mean, if this xtian didn't ever realize they were on a EX xtian website, what's the chances they book-marked this page they wrote a comment on.

What a pity to, as I wanted to know how many "shame" stamps I could get from them, that I might use to buy my very first talking snake.

Astreja, did you ever wonder how one can "pour out a spirit"?
I guess these spirits must be like the Genie in a Bottle trick, yes?

ATF (Who is off to rub his spirit bottle, to release his personal genie)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

Astreja — Sat, 24 May 2008 00:15:00 -0000

redeemed99 (a few stamps short of a booklet) whined: "I think it's a shame that people who claim to be followers of the All knowing..."

Uh, wrong website.

"'And it shall come to pass afterward,that I will pour out My Spirit upon ALL flesh; your sons and your daughters shall prophesy...' This is the time that He is doing just that!!"

Já, right. Got any proof for that god of yours?

Those kids are being abused by adults who have indoctrinated them with bullshit beliefs. My wish is that both of them turn apostate and walk away from the church forever before they reach the age of majority.

"Shame on you all that don't really know and recognize what the Lord is doing right now!!"

Shame on *you* for being so fucking stupid that you actually think that a blogful of EX-Christians gives a rat's ass about Bible quotations. The real issue is the fate of those poor kids. Shake that dust off them feet and boogie on out of here, pronto.

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

AtheistToothFairy — Fri, 23 May 2008 01:45:00 -0000

redeemed99 wrote:
... "And it shall come to pass afterward,that I will pour out My Spirit upon ALL flesh; your sons and your daughters shall prophesy..." This is the time that He is doing just that!!
---
Hey Deemed-Naive #99,

Oh, I guess god is giving away a really cool prize then.
Well, I can do the same, oh Deemed one.

Please send in your 'proof of purchase', that your god is "doing all that", along with 666 box tops from your Fruit Loops favorite breakfast cereal.
In return, we will send you (in easy to digest--comic book format) the Beginners Guide To Reality Cookbook.

Here are some examples of included topics/recipes:

1. HOT Spices you can make from Powered Devil Horns.
2. That old exorcism favorite, Pea Soup for a Stiff Neck.
3. How to be a good "Host" at a "Communion" Party.
4. True Secret Confessions from Deluded Christians.
5. How to get out Wine stains from your Jesus Robe
6. How to make Pickled Tongues for the Holy Roller Clan.
7. The Virgin Mary on Burnt Toast: Anyone can make this Holy breakfast delight.
8. How to stop germs from Evolving on your kitchen counter, in no time at all
9. Stone Soup: Use it while hot, to stone all those nasty Sabbath sinners.
10. How to make your own Flintstone Vitamins for your backyard stray Dinosaur.

If you act now, we'll send absolutely free, our famous "Pillar of Salt" Pepper Shaker

ATF (Who is looking for more ideas to add to this hot selling book)

Re: Called by GOD to preach? - ExChristian.Net - News and Opinion

boomSLANG — Thu, 22 May 2008 23:03:00 -0000

Shame on you all that don't really know and recognize what the Lord is doing right now!!

What's a shame, is that you will spend every waking second of the only life you'll ever have, believing a lie.